Daily misery

This blog is in serious danger of turning itself into one of those self-absorbing, narcissist cum asshole type of blogspace if I am to write one more entry about me, Alvin, Alvin Woon or my obvious love for cheesecake. The last thing I want is to turn Daily Misery into another Truman show manuscript. As Daily Misery is fastly approaching 1000 unique visitors per day, maybe the time has come to show DM’s readers the background colors of my somewhat blessed life.

Of course, life is never about you or me, its more like a self-evolving experience involving people around you - its more about the guy/girl next door. Dont get me wrong, I appreciate that you guys love to read about what I’ve posted so far, but it would mean a whole lot to me if 10 or 20 years from now, if I happen to have the chance to reread back some of my postings, that my circles of friends or just people I brushed through during this time this year will also feature in this little history book of mine. I want to write about that hot chick who I buy coffee from every morning when I walked through Old Father’s Hall. Its about the African American guy next door who always say ‘Yo wassup’ whenever we bump into each other. Its about this guy in my work place who has a striking resemblance to Sylvester Stallone. Its about this China girl who always says sorry to me even though she’s done absolutely nothing wrong. Its about my roomate who has developed a somewhat interesting habit of ironing his shirt at 12 o’clock midnight. It’s about something that’s not about me.

Well, tonight, its about this girl with her rabbit, Lilo. I have known Joyce for like 2 years (give or take a few months). You have never seen a one million dollar smile until you’ve seen Joyce’s smile. Its that captivating. She’s one of those people when you told her you’ve just killed someone, she would say “oh, so what are you going to do? Do you want me to come over?”. That little cutie pie wrapped warmly around her arms is Lilo. See I have never doubt how passionate girls can get when it comes to this whole pet thingie - they probably would DIE for these cute creatures. But I can never understand their taste when it comes to the naming process. Lilo the rabbit? *sigh*. I have told my gf that if we do have kids in the future, I want to be the one responsible for naming our babies.

Moving on, Joyce told me Lilo can be a bitch at times, whatever that is suppose to mean. But the way she talks about Lilo, and how she would put on different pictures of her and Lilo on her MSN display on every other days tells me where she places Lilo within the little pocket of her heart. Thing is, taking care of a pet involves a lot of responsibility, not to mention the hierarchical level of emotional pains one has to endure when that special little life has to pay a visit to the mystic land of eternity. I can never take it. I remember too well when my mom accidentally ran through my little puppy with her car when I was eight; The worst part is she died slowly with her body still shaking during the last few minutes prior to her death and that little puppyish cries of her…. I didnt speak with my mom for one week. Every year, my sister and I would place flowers on that exact same place where my father and I had buried her. I probably keep the ritual going until I was like 10 or something. It was heartbreaking. It sure requires a lot courages but I am sure every single bits of it is worth many many bits of what may come through. Everyday I see Joyce, her face tells me so.

But life’s too short to worry about that. Especially when you have little creature like Lilo running around the house.

Something for me to self-reflect on for the rest of the week.

Just when you thought the world couldnt get anymore worse…

I bit my thumb nail so hard that it bled when I read this today. Blank…its all blank in my head.

Never had I felt so helpless and angry before.

Tens of Thousands Said Raped in East Congo

By BRYAN MEALER, Associated Press Writer
1 hour, 44 minutes ago

KINSHASA, Congo - Militiamen and renegade soldiers have raped and beaten tens of thousands of women and young girls in eastern Congo, and nearly all the crimes have gone unpunished by the country’s broken judicial system, an international human rights group said Monday.

Hundreds of new rapes are reported every week, but only 10 soldiers and militants have been convicted of rape in relatively lawless eastern Congo since the end of the country’s devastating war in 2002, New York-based Human Rights Watch said in a report…

Full news article

Since I had came across quite a few child abuse cases in the news recently, I think it would be appropriate to repost the poem I had wrote about a year ago, for which it generated quite a hype back then. I dont know why i would want to repost it, maybe its just that I am too tired of this beautiful world.

Butterfly scent, muddy pool,
Barbie doll and strawberry lollipop,
Sinful lust, teary eyes,
Bruised arm and tainted sheet.

Other kids have their daddy’s sing lullaby,
I have my daddy touching me and my baby,
It starts in a room so gloomy,
And ends with tears and oh, “I am so sorry’
It’s ok, daddy loves me,
He pushed me, hit me, curse me and r*** me,
It’s ok, daddy just has a bad day,
Then he did it again and again,
It’s ok, it’s really ok.
My panty is painted with blood,
And yet everything still has to be ok.

Neither those who knows cares,
Mommy would just turn away and close the door,
I beg him to stop,
I beg her for help,
I said ‘Please daddy, dont’ so many times,
That my tougue starts to bleed and melt,
Yet I was left starving for hope,
Too much shame were left to be felt,

I have always said to myself,
Maybe he will stop when I grow up,
He did, when he found Brenda,
She was just 6, my daughter,
Just like me, blue eyes blue,
Still too innocent to understand,
what her daddy was doing to her is wrong,
My daughter father is my father,
And my mother is my mother and her stepmother,
Even Einstein would be confused by the relativity,
and I am close to the edge of lunaticity,
For the love of God, she’s already a sick child
Born with homogenous genes from an incentous sin,
And now she is a sick child with post-traumatic disorder,
Brought down to earth into the hands of savage perversion,

I have to kill him,
I want to kill him,
I want to kill them all,
41 stabs, daddy laid on the floor,
Then I slit mom’s throat,
Standing upon the pool of blood,
I laughed,
then I cried.

Flower scent, grass playground,
4 white walls and countless stares,
Crime scene, 155 years,
Tired eyes and tainted sheet.

I dream of a home,
Where daddy sings lullaby,
and mommy makes pancakes,
A home where,
Daddy’s hand is to wipe my tears,
A home where,
I can never be too afraid to keep my room unlock,
A home where,
Daddy only comes into my room late at night to make sure I put my blanket on,
A home where,
The love of parenthood doesnt bend so far.
A home I can only dream of behind the bar.

© Alvin Woon
Crafted on 15th February 2004

*Inspired by a true story. Subject’s name has been changed

*untitled*
Along the mellow tones you dance,
through the sparkling sand under the wind,
an opening worth of a thunder kind,
every moves decorates every minds,
with the finale a wonder shine

Author’s note: I am just boring, ignore me. I think this is what I am going to do in DM for the rest of the week, or month - write one line everyday to hopefully complete the poem and cross out lines that seem funny, elegant and too good to be true. Do feel free to chip in anytime should you find yourself in an extreme state of boredom-ness. We have more than available space to share our…uh..boredom-ness. Besides, I am not very good at expressing myself with the use of minimal words, could use some helps here.

Lemonade anyone?

Oh lastly, when Song Hae Gyo cries, there’s ntg in world - that includes homosapien, dog, cat, squirrel and ameoba - that can hold back from crying with her.

*untitled*
Along the mellow tones you dance,
through the sparkling sand under the wind,
an opening worth of a thunder kind,
every moves decorates every minds,
with the finale a wonder shine

Captivating stares fill the room
under the dark ceiling beneath the hall
yet all are good in home
aint fair to spare anymore of this doom
just waiting for years for the sword to fall.
and to spend eternity enthralled*
trading curiosity for a lifetime of gloom*

Update: * by Kristof

K, lets take a break from the poem brain-storming. I want to tell you guys about this coffee house that I frequent. Its called..uh..The Coffee House. I initially plan to blog about itonly after I take some pictures of it but we can do that later.

Stepping inside, one will easily be captivated by the aroma and decoration in this small but cozy main hall. It has sofas and table-chair combinations with plenty of magazines and newspaper to fill the day. For those who need some quiet space to read and study, you can go straight to the end of the hall where there’s another small hall with reminicense of the 80’s atmosphere. Most of the wall paintings are either portraits of women with bare chest or abstract pictures of emm..women with bare breast. This proves to be very helpful when your eyes get all sored up reading the textbook or newspaper. K, what make this coffee house so special that I made it my official study hall?

1.) It serves the best plain cheesecake in town. There’re also apple cheesecakes, buns and cookies. But damn the plain cheesecake is the softest cheesecake I have ever tasted.
2.) The coffee of course. They have like hundreds of variants of coffee beans with different syrup mixtures that will keep you up Up UP. Their Irish Mocha is heaven-like and normal coffee refill costs only 25 cent per fill - what a steal!
3.) Its quiet and they play jazz, soft alternatives or spanish songs which can be quite disturbing when all the drums and termelo starts kicking in. But overall very peaceful and quiet place to stare at papers with words.

I will upload some pictures soon. I wish every place I go in near future has a coffee house like this.

I cant imagine what I will do without my lovely widgets. I have one widget that let me take notes on a simple but elegant notepad-like interface. The second widget is the weather widget. They were so convenient, slick and informative….until this came along.

See where the red color finger is pointing at? Ok, what the hell is the greenish white icon suppose to mean? Does it mean there’ll be flurry on this coming Thursday? Or a snowstorm? Typhoon? What is going to happen on Thursday? It might have not matter if you are in Malaysia or California where the sun and star smile at each other with the cloud dancing around and the moon sipping his cup of coffee relaxing. In Lincoln NE, all those elements get moody fast, hell they change more rapidly than Michael Jackson’s face.

Crap, it’s 16 minutes into Thrusday right now.

Update: One of my buddy just msn me that the greenish thing represents St. Patricks day. Why? Why does that have anything to do with how the sun is going to look like tommorow? Or how the rain is…nvm. This is bad usability design.

K, now go away. I dont want you guys to see me cry.

Now its your turn.

As one grows older, he/she tends to drop of a few do’s from his/her pocket along the journey of life. Some were due to the time trend, some were due to physical / financial / demographical constraints and some others were due to the changes of personal liking. Some do’s might have also been substituted by other do’s.

I’m 23. As I venture closer and closer to the stressland of adulthood ( I’m still not in it, at least my brain isnt), I realize I no longer do some of the things which a 15 year old version of me would’ve done on regular basis. And I didnt even realize it all along. I no longer

• » Feel excited about Chinese New Year. (you can blame part of that on my 2 year hiatus in this foreign land of obscurity)
• » Tie my shoelaces. Right now due to time constraint, my shoelaces are always ‘readily’ tied just so that I can slip my foot in with apparent ease, run out of the door, hand holdings bagels and strap my messenger bag across my back - all under 5 seconds.
• » Hit on girls that have sweet smiles. Actually I stopped doing that three years ago when I met Karen.
• » Play counter strike. CS is taken over by battlefield 1942 ever since I arrived in US.
• » Play soccer. I used to be David Beckham on the pitch. Now I am just David Belly Ham.
• » Drink Sprite. Nah, the white liquid is totally taken over by the black-power combination of Coke and Pepsi….and coffee
• » Laugh a lot. This is just plain sad. I used to laugh a whole lot, partly because I have a huge mouth (according to my gf), so even when I have one of those small laughs, most people will think that I am laughing my ass off.
• » Wash my underwear. Just kidding, I still do that, just not as often as I would have preferred. Lol, again kidding.
• » Go to church. I want to do that again, soon.
• » I no longer watch NYPD and ER. Like many, CSI, Friends and 24 have totally taken over my 9.00 pm.
• »Sing Sesame Streets tunes while I’m in shower.

To be continue……

K, first thing first, I just got back from campus at around 12 noon (2am malaysian time) and found out my gf left me a voicemail. She just left a quick one saying ‘i love you…...and there’s an earthquake in Sumatra that can be felt quite strongly in Kuala Lumpur‘. She didnt say whether she was allright, and i tried to call back but the phone line didnt work. So what should i do?! What should i do?! *Calm down Alvin* *Whoosaaa…* But she lives on like the 10th floor of a super-high condominum. How can i calm the fcuking down?!!! *Whoosaaa*

That ought to get me worry more than a bit. Yahoo! news didnt help much by reporting the magnitude of the quake hovered around 8.2! This certainly takes another 2 or 3 years out of my life. Can DM’s malaysian reader please provide me somesort of real time updates on how the situation in Malaysia is right now? Did any buildings collapse or roads turn upside down or massive waves terrorizing through our beaches? Anything that will helps to make me feel a little bit at ease.

K, second updates would be emm, Malaysian night had just been concluded on a high note. Syabas to all volunteers and performers. There’s a lot of pictures out on the web since everyone pretty much own a digital camera for fun right now (kids nowadays, *sigh*). Here’s some pictures from some of my fren’s site. The list will grows in the next couple of days.

www.huineechin.com

Since everyone pretty much has the same set of photos, I am just gonna handpick some photos and come out with my own theme for this year event - Hot chicks of Malaysian Night 2005. Click on the pictures below to go to the photo gallery.

Btw I’m sick, so there might be some typo errors in this posting or I might get all grumpy in replying all your emails, rest assure I’ll be back running in the wild in no times. That is if I am still alive after taking some tylenol tablets that says in the label: expiry date: February 2004.

*You can however, kindly blame it on Yic Teng should there’s name spelling error in the photo gallery. She refers herself as Leng Lui or Super Leng Lui in there. She is the one responsible for captioning the name in all the pictures. I’ve always had chronic difficulties when it comes to remembering name and telephone numbers of ppl that i know. Dont take it to your heart cuz I even did it to my own close frens. I really did try….